WARNING: This is a very long post.
The day of my 70th started out so well. From then on it got so much better AFTER taking me 10 minutes to tie my shoe laces.
A car horn outside sounded, “Beep … Beeep … Beeeeeeeep !”
Wow ! Einar’s Mercedes ! Hilda, my party organiser, tried to take the first photograph. As you can see she is
an expert highly professional very willing camerawoman.
(The same blooper happened to Carmen’s husband in this post)
Once the camera started taking photographs, Einar scooped me up and conveyed me around the village TWICE. I became quite giddy !
My village in southern Spain
Amazingly it was a lovely sunny, but cold afternoon. The day before and the day after it bucketed it down with rain. After passing every bar in the village Einar finally pulled up outside Pili Bar where my friends were waiting to greet me. What a surprise ! Can you see me in this photo ? Clue: hat !
An even extra surprise was this room. Thank you so much Hilda, Adrian & Louise for setting it up the evening before. Can you guess what my favourite colour is ?
After our traditional chicken & chips meal, Hilda poked me to say a few words
My speech started off well by me saying,
“I have lived in this village for 14 years and have made some marvellous friends. NOT YOU LOT !”
I did come out of that speech alive.
The “gang” ganged up and gave me a joint present. Can you guess what my favourite colour wrapping paper is ?
Yes, it was a painting of my two cats by Jim.
I was really touched.
Then in came the cake. Chocolate ! Followed by a Cheesecake !
Can you work out the party theme ?
Does Jim have a medical condition ? Green is not good !
Max, Hilda & Louise. Wine tasters.
Louise & Max
3 not so wise men. Jim, Adrian & Bill
Jenny leading to my alcoholic downfall ……….
……… through a drinking straw.
Is it a bird ? Is it a plane ? No, it’s Super-70 ! ………..
…… who just happened to land on Jenny’s lap.
Okay, I was naughty. Max whacked me with her wand and sent me home with no tea.
All say, “Me next !”.
On arriving home my organiser Hilda hung this wonderful picture for me in the hall.
Nope ! You are staying there behind the glass.
So now there is peace in my apartment until after Christmas.
“No hell, no hell, no he-ell ….”. Sing along cats !
Merry Christmas everyone !
Love & hugs.
❤ Samantha, Sonic, China Cat, CooCoo, Binbo and their long suffering human. ❤
You can’t blame me ‘cos I was kept in the dark about everything to do with the party.
Ralph xox ❤
Hello lovely bubblies. Yes, between you and me, we have exceeded 25000 approved comments over this blog’s four and a half years. 25000 ? Really ? I have no idea what we talked about as my memory has gone due to …..
Yes, today I am 70 years old; a day when everything goes downhill; a day when I lose my memory, forget to zip up my trousers, walk to the shops in my slippers and on arrival forget what I am there for; a day when I am known locally in this Spànish village for being the notorious English Unzipped Slipper-Wearing Forgetful Shopper. (I think it was the unzipped bit which swung it)
One amazing gift I received was from Sonata who must have taken forever to create the following. Thank you so, so much my friend 🙂
Did you spot your avatar ?
You are very welcome to vote as many times as you like in this poll.
If none of my suggestions ring your bell then I am sure you will comment later with your devious fun ideas. Can’t wait !
Hey cats ! Aren’t you going to wish me a happy birthday ?
I said ………
At least be a little bit enthusiastic.
No I didn’t ! You two should be giving me a present !
So much for turning 70. Nothing’s changed !
I am publishing this post really early on my birthday morning. Must get some sleep before my party this afternoon. Yes, there will be photos in my next post.
Now ! Where are my slippers ?
Ralph xox ❤
It’s really quiet here in the kitchen. I wonder what the cats are up to in my bedroom.
The music is “We Three Kings – Karaoke Christmas Song” (YouTube)
See what I have to put up with. Cats ! Who’d have them ! 🙂
Ralph xox ❤
Hi lovely bubblies. I’m back after 6 weeks … sort of. Okay, I know you are saying to yourself,
“Oh Nooooo !”
… but a man’s got to do what a man’s got to do … ruin your day !
My old laptop died so the Spanish technician told me after 5 weeks. To stay in touch with you I used a psychotic tablet that switched off in the middle of every long comment I pecked at letter by letter. Your posts loaded slower than snail mail. The list goes on. I was like a fish out of water or a heron on a roof top.
I tidied up the cupboards.
Shush Samantha ! I organised my paperwork.
For goodness sake, SHUT UP Samantha ! Toni, my neighbour, removed the hornets nests. I supervised of course.
Thanks Toni. Really most of my days were spent cleaning up after my cats.
I have a new laptop. It’s a crazy Spanish Windows 10 smartphone on steroids ! It took me days to set up the way I wanted in ENGLISH with a Spanish keyboard. THEN … I verified that I am who I am with Microsoft and decided to go to bed early and shut down with an update. Update … a little word, isn’t it ?. Oh boy, was I in for IT ! One hour of hypnotising English update spinning dots …
and three hours of Spanish spinning dots !
By then I was watching an imaginary spinning skirt instead of dots.
Finally at 5am, when, at last, I could see what these updates had done. The display and Start Menu had changed and most apps are now SPANISH ! Who wants an expensive Frisbee laptop ? 🙂
BUT … I will be strong, go forth with an English stiff upper lip, fix the ……..
Oh boy ! Some holiday ! 🙂
Ralph xox ❤
The spinning gifs are not mine.
I am disappointed. My good for nothing cats just lie around and sleep all day.
Even the sheep out the back, who the cats should be counting to go to sleep, are disappointed and have gone to sleep themselves as they are never counted and have got bored.
So I am going to change all that and bring in a strict exercise regime for my cats. But nothing like the way my Spanish friend, Manuel, exercises his dog Yaki (Yak Key).
Queen – Bicycle Race
Wake up cats ! Daddy is coming for you !
Sonic ! Stop pretending that you have stuff to do ! Come on into the bedroom we need to have a serious talk !
Right you three, you need to wake up and get some exercise. So Daddy has worked out a daily schedule to get you fit and healthy.
Okay, I can see your point China Cat. You are excused from exercising and you don’t have a wedgie. You have a WEDGE jammed under the bedroom door to stop it slamming in the wind and throwing you down the hall. These are wedgies !
Right you TWO ! This is how it is going to work.
When I wake up in the morning I’ll brush your fur as normal …..
…. then you will do an hour of yoga ….
…. followed by chasing your toys around the apartment until you drop
And if there is any slacking, you will do it all again in the afternoon. Got it ??
I’m going to make myself a coffee. Talk amongst yourselves and when I come back I want to hear a “Yes, Daddy, we are really happy to do lots of exercises”.
Right cats, ready for yourrrr ….. where’s Sonic ???
Ummm…yes ! You mean this Samantha ?
Sonic’s NOT on my laptop telling all my female readers ????? Nooooo !!!!
You rotten ….. okay, you win. No more talk about exercises. Call Sonic off !!
Oh boy !! *faint*
Sonic says Daddy is !
Ralph xox ❤
The gifs, yoga and cartoon were found on Google Search and are not mine.
Yes, this is my 300th blog post. Some of you have been with me from almost the very beginning. It is like a marriage, but we have never had a domestic, have we ?
What do you mean, there are other women reading this post ? No there’s not, there’s only you. No, I’m NOT arguing ! Oh boy ! 😉
Donny Osmond singing
Kitty Puppy Love (1972)
Yes, both Resa and I are our cats’ slaves. All the credit for this post must go to Resa for sending me the following lovely photos of her cats and Bad Boy. Thank you. We had a lot of fun, didn’t we my friend ? Enough about us. On with the post !
The other day, out of the blue, arrived this love letter for Sonic.
It’s a little difficult to read. It says >>>
“Dear Sonic, I have had a crush on you since mommy showed me your picture. I hope you feel the same ! With love, Jeepo”
So excited with all the attention Sonic fell asleep for 10 hours and then replied >>>
Almost instantly, Jeepo replied with these four pictures of herself >>>>
It said >>>
“Dear Sonic, This is my special bed where I am collecting fur. I’m hoping to send you a big fur ball one day”
Totally jealous and not to be out done, China Cat had to get in on the act.
You may remember that Black Drake was created by Belén Soto
Don’t tell Donald Trump that Black Drake emigrated, probably illegally, to Resa’s home in Canada.
I digress. Eventually Black Drake replied to China Cat >>>
“Dear China Cat,
I have someone I want you to meet! (a bad boy friend of mine!)
However, first mommy has to cut mats of fur off of Johnny, & take more pictures for Samantha!
Johnny knows & is hiding. He has lots of mats.
As soon as the whole Johnny thing is over, I’ll be writing and sending you a pic of my friend.
Samantha. There’s male for you !
What’s the matter Samantha ?
Oh no ! My slippers are years old and I haven’t yet found a shop here in Spain that sells them in my size, as I am UK 11 1/2 or EUR 46.
You must reply to Johnny, Samantha !
For heavens sake Samantha, answer him !
Well, say something !
There. That wasn’t so hard, was it Samantha ?
Yes, I love you Mystery Woman.
I love you because you are you and you know who you are, don’t you ?
(Wow, that’s six “you”s in one sentence)
I will stick a pin in the spinning globe above. Three things could happen. Firstly, the world might possibly go pop. Secondly, if you go “Ouch !” you are the Mystery Woman. And finally if everyone goes “Ouch !” I will be in the middle of one hell of a domestic ! Oh boy !
I’ve not tried bribery yet. An old slipper should work.
Ralph xox ❤
Camera charged. Ralph dressed up. Off I went to watch the tiny carnival procession in my local Spanish village. On my return I transferred the 35 photographs into my laptop and *sigh* not one came out any sense. Do I delete them ? No ! You know me, I’ll have fun with them at the expense of the eyes of my readers. I am very kind like that !
BTW my eyesight is bad and it wasn’t caused by looking at THESE photographs 😉
What is this photograph all about ? Is it (a) or (b) ? I will give you the answer further down this post.
What do you think created these abysmal photographs ? Is it >>>
1. The tuition I have been given by the photographic
Mistress Master Pelly who sometimes uses a blur technique.
….. or is it ? >>>>
2. The photographs were taken at the point where day met night and my camera had a nervous breakdown not knowing whether to flash or not.
3. My hands shook too much.
4. The planetary rotation of the Earth was affected at the same instant I took each photograph by the jumping up and down and pulling out of hair by readers of my latest blog post.
Our small Spanish village does not have a Zika Virus mosquito problem, but what would happen if it did ?
The mosquitoes would be driven insane by a very enthusiastic out of tune marching band.
The village scientists drowning themselves in wine and whiskey would come up with the ultimate solution of mosquito eradication.
The correct answer is (a), not (b), but could be a (C cup).
At this point in the post I probably only have one reader left. Here she is !
You can restore your eyesight by looking at the brilliant photographs of our Spanish village feria by visiting Jose Manuel Bujalance Palma in Facebook.
You won’t believe this. In fact I don’t believe this. My good for nothing black cat Sonic who sleeps all day, complains bitterly when not petted or fed on time and keeps me awake as I am just dropping off to sleep at night has just received a love letter ! Yes, a love letter ! Heck, I’ve never ever received a love letter ! Do you want to read it ? Okay, I will show it to you in my next post including what Samantha has fallen in love with.
Oh boy !
BTW if by some miracle I do receive email love letters from you. When I have picked myself up after fainting I will publish them including your avatar and links to your blog. I am kind like that. I may even reply in a desperate sort of way 😀
Ralph xox ❤
I have just passed the fourth year of blogging with WordPressCom. I really must get a life !
Perhaps I will !
Hilda is a great local friend to me. Remember how she and her husband, David, hosted the Summer Party ? And some of you may remember Hilda helping out as my Interior Designer when my apartment was renovated.
She also buys the cat treats when they go to Murky Donna supermarket.
And then there was the time when Manny, a teddy bear blogger from California, clambered around in her cleavage. He loved that !
Anyway, she suggests ….
Yes, on the 15th of December this year is my 70th birthday.
Maybe I should invite Elena from my Spanish village Tabac.
…. impressing her with my Sunday best suit. I must remember to paint my nails 😀
How about a cabaret ?
Beth ! You’re hired !
What do you think ? What will make a party to remember ?
You are also very welcome to mail me a birthday card, the funnier the better >>>
137, Canada del Real Tesoro,
29391 Estacion Cortes de la Frontera,
Or, come to the party !
Talking of Hilda. The other day the local village put on an Hawaiian night on the beach of the local river where I tried out Tai Chi.
Even though the party was only 50 yards away from my home, I didn’t go as my ankles were swollen probably from the heat of the day and I didn’t want to take the chance of having a fall on the stones. Still, Mary and Hilda had a great time !
Meanwhile, back in Daddy’s bedroom.
Suddenly a strong gust of wind blew into the bedroom ….
…. swirling behind the bedroom door, the door slammed shut, casting China Cat into a heap on the hallway floor.
Whew ! What have you cats been up to ? I have restarted Coo Coo, put China Cat back and closed the bedroom balcony door to block off that gusty wind. What is going on ?
Oh boy !
For me, an imaginary kiss and a cuddle with an imaginary girlfriend would be nice ! 😳
Ralph xox ❤
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