This is what a man looks like when he realises that he is getting married in two weeks time.
Last Friday at very short notice, really short notice, friends of Jim met up in a local Spanish bar for his “sort of” stag night. It was daylight !
As for the women, they were organised ! Einar left his home for the bar with tales of Louise’s hen night in full swing. Table strewn with “confetti”, champagne bottles already empty downed through penis drinking straws. Erect jelly babies with added calories. And they were only a half an hour into it !
The men, another kettle of fish ! Well, three of them went fishing in the river (caught 6 barbel, returned to the water) then onto the bar for a beer or two, or three !
That was the extent of male organisation.
No stripper, not even paint stripper ! And the sheep ran away !
You know the game ! Someone sticks something on your forehead and you guess away !
Am I male ? Yes !
Am I upstanding, but generally hangs himself ? Yes !
Is hair a feature ? Yes !
Do I do one thing and then do something completely different ? Yes !
Am I Donald Trump ? Yessss ! You guessed it !
Cheers Jim & Louise ! Have a wonderful wedding in the UK on the 16th !
So I slowly made my way home, singing that after party classic !
I arrived outside my home. What’s going on ? My young Spanish neighbour Pedro, his three children and pet dog Niña were standing on their front balcony in total shock. It transpired that the new neighbour’s wife went mental over Pedro’s children doing things that children do. She shouted at them, saying things like, “Go home to Africa !” and promptly emptied her street sweepings on our door step.
It was Friday night ! Pedro called the local police.
Guess what I saw in the street over the weekend !
Oh boy !
Monday arrived. Jack hammer day ! All day ! Pretty much every square foot of the new neighbours house front has been ravaged by the jack hammer. The noise was awful and then it suddenly stopped. Yay !
The local police arrived to visit the new neighbours. Two and a half days after Pedro’s phone call, it must be a serious matter !
We could hear what the policeman was saying. Things like,
“Please be calm lady. Forget cleaning the street as the Town Hall has people to do that !“.
(She’s out sweeping the street now, 3 hours before this post goes live. So much for the local police advice ! Oh boy !)
As soon as he drove away the jack hammering restarted with a vengeance. For heaven’s sake. !
The new neighbour gave me the finger when I complained to him about the awful noise. That was a no-no. I have initiated payback. If it works I’ll update you my friends !
Remember: A great friend is a treasure, gold, a keeper; whereas an enemy is dust which is easily blown away and forgotten.
Oh no ! Not her ! 😦
Ralph xox ❤
...because life is funny.
...sometimes lighthearted but always delighting in the Light...
writing my way from misery to bliss, one word at a time
Welcome to my Art Blog and follow my adventure. Bohemian artist who loves to travel and draw.
The life of a waitress…in all its glory.
Discover Life, Incredible People, Places and Our World!
Loving Life On and Off the Tracks
A life in a photobooth.
Work in progress
Single and Over 40 and Not Suicidal About It
cruise ship adventures
This is my story and I'm sticking to it!
Poetry & Medicine
my learning journey
Traveling & Blogging Near and Far
A great WordPress.com site
Inspiring the WOW factor in life and business
Mishaps with men, mental health, BBC and drugs
Una visión sobre el complejo y apasionante mundo de la cerámica
a blog for kids and kids at heart
Relationships reveal our hearts.
The Fifth Corner of Life
Photography, travel,art,craft,writing and all things creative...
Lover of All Things Wordy Nerdy and Introverty
fashionable over 50
Books, musings, news...
Food, Travel and Eating Out
Luxuriating in Ephemeral Art
Read the difference
Illustration is the passion of my life!
An Englishman, his Sicilian wife and an Italian / English Dictionary
Where You Live Happily Ever Laughter!
Smexy Historical Romance
cities - cultures - ocean - marine life
A broad blogs broadly on women’s & men's psychology: sex, relationships, equality
The Art of Glamorous Fantasy
Uncorked tales from Andalucia.
A trip through life with fingers crossed and eternal optimism.
Walk along with me