Holiday. Wifi Log Burner. Latest Top Searches

Planning my holiday for next year

In a previous post I  Could….” I threw some ideas into the pot and I have whittled them down to taking a holiday next year.

I have two ideas:

A Cruise

I could go on an ocean cruise
I could go on an ocean cruise

I have studied this in some depth and have put this one on the back burner for now.

Fly Somewhere:

I could fly
I could fly

My idea is to pick a country. Fly to it and annoy visit fellow bloggers. That will ruin make their day !!

So what do you think ?

Would you like me to annoy visit you ??


I have invented the wifi log burning stove

My wifi log burner
My wifi log burner

As you may have noticed there is no connection between my log burner and its chimney. This is a new invention of mine. I can move the log burner anywhere in the apartment and the smoke will automatically find its way to and go up the chimney. Clever eh !!

Okay. Who believed that ??  The fireplace company still has not received a right angle pipe to connect the two together yet. hehe !!


Top  Searches (Latest)

Crazy top searches.
Crazy top searches on my Dashboard.

Okay. Own up. Who wrote these in my Dashboard ?? 🙂

am i flirt

the best thing for me is my village

the flat girl

bra on the ironing board

sevilla shaved nipples

wooden backscratches

hidden satellite dish on balcony

*between my shoulder” itchy scratch can’t reach

fish front coach purse

pointiest nipples world “young lady” “dear” flirting

women breast on dinner plates

colourful chick apartment

natural long nipples

o.a.p floppy breasts

These have all been copied from my dashboard over the last couple of weeks !! So funny !! 🙂


Ralph xox 🙂


40 Comments on “Holiday. Wifi Log Burner. Latest Top Searches

    • I know is wasn’t you Sylvia. There was no “hunky firemen” or “6 packs” or “I love Ralph” searches. 😉
      I am going to enjoy using the log burner in the winter and I am sure the cats will wrap themselves around it.
      Have a lovely evening my friend. Ralph xox 😀


  1. Woman breast on dinner plate. ??? That’s kind of alarming isn’t it?
    Hope there’s no serial killer cannibals stalking your blog.

    I think you should go on a cruise Ralph! You’d love it, I’m sure.
    Lots of single ladies on cruises too….. 😉


    • You have now got me worried now Tracy. I have many women stalkers but no cannonballs that I know of 😀
      I had a talk with friends who have been on cruises and the one thing that put me off cruises a bit is that you are assigned a table for eating and if you don’t get on with the fellow table guests you are either stuck with it for the whole cruise or spend money at another cafeteria. Secondly if I go alone a 100% surcharge is applied because I am single and use up a double cabin. I could take a friend for free in that case. Any volunteers ?? Big hug. Ralph xox 😀


      • Maybe it depends on which cruise you go on? The one we went on had a buffet which had excellent food (so many choices, and all delicious,a bd best of all, ALL FREE) so we went there and could sit wherever. Only one night we went to the “restaurant” and were seated next to strangers, but I got the impression that each time it would be a different seat we got allocated to, unless we requested it. I also read in the cruise reviews that you could book a seat early in the cruise and have it all to yourself.
        Yes, if you go alone you will be paying full price for your room.
        What we did was wait till the last minute to book the cruise and usually because they want to fill the numbers you can get a good deal. We only paid $600 for a nine day cruise! Some other people we talked to paid double that!


      • I have found a website with discounts of up to 85%. Is it a genuine site though ? I will take a chance with them. Thanks for all your info and experience with cruising. I do appreciate what you have told me and I must make a decision soon. Love Indecisive Ralph xox


      • See if you can find reviews Ralph. I spent quite some time reading peoples cruise reviews before I went.


      • Now that I have decided on my departure point I will do what you suggest and see what people have to say about cruises out of Malaga. Thanks Tracy. 😀


      • lol
        first ….google coracle(then laugh a lot)
        next…the log burner silly
        next…no wait…looks at insides of eyelids going uhhhmmmm


  2. Very lovely sentences………… they really should be from a very warm person :)! I still say cruise, that shall be the perfect option, you will never be alone and when you want you can always close your room when you don`t want to see anyone 🙂 ! Also on the cruise-boat there are always a lot of singles in all kind of ages and types and there will be for sure one lovely person for you to merry or only for a good laugh ! Xoxo


    • I am now warming towards a cruise. I like the idea of “one lovely person for you to merry or only for a good laugh”. Did you mean “marry” or shall I stick with “merry” 😉 Have a lovely evening Serach. Ralph xox 😀


      • I meant merry but it could be become also Marry :), thanks Ralph and you too have a blissful evening ! Xoxo


      • I just so happen to be free for both eventualities my friend. Big hug. xox


  3. A cruise is the best bet for as previous commenters have suggested you can relax when you want and socialize when you are fit to be merry. You can ragale yoiur fellow cruisers with tall tales of your escapades and near escapes from disaster. And very likely find romance but at the same time I think that you would need to be very careful of encounters for there are “black widows” out and about who will try to scam you by hook, rook, and crook.

    Now, did I just discourage you from a cruise? 🙂 I’m mostly joking here but then…

    yvonne xxxx


    • Hi Yvonne 😀 Innocent me had to look up “black widow” and the Urban Dictionary says “A disingenuous woman who exploits her position in a relationship to the detriment of her partner”. Have you put me off cruises …… yes !! Would I go on a cruise ? ……… yes !! Would I get scammed by a black widow ……. yes !! I just can’t say no !! 😉 Ralph xox 😀


      • Ralph, Ralph, Ralph! You have a problem??? Or maybe not. Too funny. I am so glad that I was the conveyor of a new phrase or whatever it is supoosed to be called. So maybe you can be called the pinked dummy or something similiar? 🙂 🙂 🙂

        Yvonne xox


      • I have just googled “the pinked dummy” and Google blew up 😉 !! I have a feeling that you are one of those “black widows” as you seem to know the terminology and code words such as “the pinked dummy”. 😉 Do they have cruise ships in central Texas ……. must do, as you know too much 😉


  4. Let’s hope your log burner will be fixed before it gets too cold. Just look for a singles cruise then there should not be a surcharge. They do have single cabins too, a lot of my friends go on cruises and they all love it.
    I would just go for it and enjoy it, take a risk and have an adventure with no expectations. Do it while it is cold in Spain and you keep warm somewhere else.
    Good luck with finding a good one!


    • Hi Ute 😀 I am hoping the part will arrive next week. I will then ask David to take me to the coast to buy all the accessories needed for the fire in preparation for the cold winters.
      I have been going crosseyed over the last few days researching single/over 50 cruises. Such a choice !! I am going to have to make a decision soon. Your comment may have given me the push I need after Yvonne’s comment 😉 I have never been on a cruise before so it will be an adventure as you say.
      Have a lovely week my friend. Ralph xox 😀


  5. Hmm, I do not think any of those ideas are good for you. How about find more enjoyable things where you are now – Stay-cation may be the best 😉


    • You always have a wise head on you YC. Maybe I don’t need to get married, just post my problem and get 50 different answers and work with the majority. Staying at home is a good idea as I would be worried about my cats. I was in hospital for 8 days last November. Even though a friend was here for a few minutes each day to feed them, when I got home the flat was cold and the cats were hiding under the bed and it took me ages to coax them out and get the apartment warm for them. Would I worry about them on holiday ….. yes !! Half of me wants to go on a long holiday and the other half stays at home. What a problem !! Ralph xox 😀


  6. Ralph, you’re still single? What’s up with that? I vote cruise all the way! With your charm and personality you’d have a ball and who knows …! Good luck with your stove. When does it start getting cooler there? Still a little too warm here! Best of luck with your choice of vacation my friend! xo 🙂


    • Hi Penny. Of course I am still single. I have decided that as it’s my first cruise I will go on one from Malaga which is only a 2 hour drive from my home and see if I like cruises. I hope to have a ball as you say.
      The nights are definitely getting cooler though the daylight hours are still hot. Have a lovely day my friend. Ralph xox 😀


      • What do you mean of course, Ralph? I can’t believe someone hasn’t snatched you up yet! Your first cruise sounds like the way to start, wish I lived closer, I’ve never been on a cruise either. It does sound wonderful though! And most definitely “have a ball”! dear friend, xo 🙂


      • I would be in big trouble if I had a partner who found out about all the shenanigans and flirting that I have been doing in comments. I’m not in trouble, so I must be single …. I’ll check again ….yes …. single !! 😀
        I would prefer to go on a cruise with someone …. just myself at the moment …. and maybe a goat from the field out back 😉 xox


      • Well, that’s true. And I’m thinking taking the goat along might not be a good plan … just my thoughts, however! xoxo 🙂


      • You are right my friend. The goat must stay in its field as I do not wish to enhance my Hillbilly image 😉 xox


  7. Hola Ralph-
    If you go on a cruise I suggest a bigger boat with at least basic accommodations.
    If you fly – make sure that you don’t get stuck next to a heavy sleeper that snores & drools as they lean on you as a pillow.
    As for the searches on your dash board – Ay Dios mio! Definitely not guilty.
    Hope your log burner gets set up before winter takes over the land.
    xx Saludos y Abrazos xx


    • I thought that coracle looked rather small for oceanic cruises RoSy. Not a lot of space for dancing the night away 😉
      Maybe I’m the one that snores and drools. Unlikely though as I am the perfect sleeper 😀
      I know you are not guilty my friend, for your searches would be so much more entertaining 😉
      The log burner should be up and running next week 😀
      Megahugs. Ralph xox 😀


  8. My friends and relations love to cruise. I think I would rather stay at home and find a way to be looked after and pampered in my own house ie someone to do the laundry and the cooking; someone to do the shopping; provide a head massage and a foot massage. Bliss.


    • I’ll try cruising at least once ….. on a ship not in a car !! 😉 I love the idea of all this pampering at home. The laundry and cooking I have done for me, but the rest …..I will have to work on those 😉 Have a fun day my friend. Ralph xox 😀


  9. Cruises are nice! Lots of dancing, lots of eating! That won’t hurt you, but not so good for the 5’5″ ladies you might think are cute at the beginning of the week. By the end of the week they look like barges. Best to know that going into a longer termed relationship, though! Let’s see, where does that leave California? You could come here, and we could go on a cruise, or you could just take your pick of California women. My friend Marvin is cruising to Hawaii. That gives you lots of days on the boat. We have a pretty good assortment of single women here! About the dashboard, problem… sorry not guilty!


    • Hi Marsha 😀 I am having to go back and put my thinking cat on. I like the idea of staying at home and enjoying my life in Spain. I like the idea of a cruise, initially departing locally. I like the idea of returning to California for a visit and meeting those Californian gals.
      Staying at home I know my cats would be okay. I may feel trapped on a cruise as I love the open spaces on land. I enjoyed the fun and friendliness of California ….. and Dunkin’ Donuts 😉
      Staying at home is cheap. A cruise middling. California expensive.
      Of the three on enjoyment value I feel California will win hands down.
      Ralph xox 😀


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