Dr Ralph. PhUn. Psychiatrist

Posted on 14/05/2013 by Ralph

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Over the last few weeks I have been collecting the weirdest of Top Searches in my dashboard and these are some of what WordPress gave to me :

Crowned knickers

All landmarks of a British Passport

Nipple cuppings

Family jewels castration

Hidden big nipple camera

Uncle Ralph in Bahamas

Thumbs up penthouse

Small floppy breasts

My sister with a mini skirt front of me

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What did I do to get these Top Searches in my Dashboard ??

I need to find answers and fast….. so

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Because of these ~~idiotic~~ weird words I took a crash course in psychiatry at the Bluefish Way School of Psychiatry where I studied the Works of Fried ~~chips and crisps~~. I worked tirelessly for about 5 seconds and gave myself a doctorate of psychiatry and letters after my name. So I am Dr Ralph. PhUn ~~fun~~ . I have opened my practice in downtown Bluefish Way

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So come on in !!

Lie down here !!

Comfy ?? A pillow ??

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Have you got crowned knicker problems or something that you need to get off your chest ??

Then tell Dr Ralph. PhUn. all about it 🙂

separator Sorry, no magazines !! So while you are waiting to see Dr Ralph. PhUn. please click on the meditation fish tank and feed the fish

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Ralph xox

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Category: Blogging, FunTags: crowned knickers, dashboard top searches, fun, psychiatry, Works of Fried

59 Comments on “Dr Ralph. PhUn. Psychiatrist”

Gallivanta
14/05/2013

What PhUn! But I am not sure I could trust myself on that couch. I might die laughing.

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- Ralph
  14/05/2013
  
  Hi Gallivanta. Dying laughing is part of the extras package that this practice offers. Please see Nurse Sleepalot on your way out for your next appointment. Thank you for coming. Dr Ralph. PhUn xox 😀
  
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  - Gallivanta
    14/05/2013
    
    My goodness, Dr Ralph. You offer a very prompt follow up service.This seems like a dream practice.
    
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  - Ralph
    14/05/2013
    
    Nurse Sleepalot practices dreaming all the time during opening hours. 😉 4:30 on Friday then 😉
    
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  - Gallivanta
    14/05/2013
    
    am or pm?
    your Friday or mine?
    
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  - Ralph
    14/05/2013
    
    I must lie on my couch and tell myself about the confusion issues I am having 😉
    
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  - Gallivanta
    14/05/2013
    
    Yes, take a rest.
    
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desertrose7
14/05/2013

What on earth are crowned knickers?

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- Ralph
  14/05/2013
  
  Hi Tracy. I have studied the Works of Fried extensively and find no mention of crowned knickers. It must be a new illness that some women have. I will have to delve deeply into this and do more research. This could be serious. 😉 Dr Ralph. PhUn xox 😀
  
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YellowCable
14/05/2013

I would also like to know what the “Crowned knickers” are.

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- Ralph
  14/05/2013
  
  Hi YC. I googled crowned knickers and found a royal pair of knickers with a crown on. Dr Ralph. PhUn xox 😀
  http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/9284039/Queens-knickers-sell-for-11000-on-eBay.html
  
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  - YellowCable
    15/05/2013
    
    Ah! A nice pair but way too expensive. For now, I do not need a service from Dr. Ralph. I know if I need him in the future 😉 Thank you.
    
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  - Ralph
    15/05/2013
    
    You are very welcome to call me if you need servicing by Dr Ralph. PhUn on 0800- OMG- I- WOULD- RATHER- RING- MYSELF- THAN- RING- HIM 😉
    
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Elisa
14/05/2013

that is so my speed so far this morning ty for giggles in morning instead of swearing!

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- Ralph
  14/05/2013
  
  Hi Elisa. You are cured.!! 😉 Dr Ralph. PhUn. xox 😀
  
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Katie
14/05/2013

I had a dream last night. Can you help me interpret it?
Flopped on a red velvet couch, on a plane to the islands.. In my left hand: a British passport of the queen; in my right: a cup of jewels. I blink and find myself on a penthouse balcony taking pictures of a cat. ??

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- Ralph
  14/05/2013
  
  Lie back Katie, close your eyes and tell me more. I may have to hypnotise you to find the cause of such a dream 😉 Dr Ralph. PhUn xox 😀
  
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  - Katie
    15/05/2013
    
    Well, see, I wa…..zzzzzzzzz
    
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  - Ralph
    15/05/2013
    
    Now Katie …… I can’t hear myself think. There is you Katie hypnotised at one end of the couch, and Ute with Nurse Sleepalot snoring at the other end. 😉
    
    Katie. You are in a deep sleep. What is the first thing that you can remember about the dream which Ute now has? 😉
    
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jenowenby
14/05/2013

Thank you for a great laugh this morning!

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- Ralph
  14/05/2013
  
  Thank you so much Jen. I am so pleased that you enjoyed this. Dr Ralph. PhUn xox 😀
  
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petspeopleandlife
14/05/2013

Simply wonderful photos. These are among the top of all Internet photos that I have seen only to be outdone by great pet photos. 🙂

�

________________________________

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- Ralph
  14/05/2013
  
  Hi Yvonne. This is off topic.
  
  For those who are not participating, as well as my non-stop medical duties, I receive photographs & jokes some of which are very naughty but fun and I pass them on to about 10 friends. If you want to be put on my mailing list ….. tell me !!
  
  This batch were top notch Yvonne. Ralph xox 😀 (off duty)
  
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  - petspeopleandlife
    14/05/2013
    
    A short while ago I got your post and something else mixed up. You see I am already mixed up and cleary in need of a shrink. But it seems to me that you apparently are the shrink for me even though long distance by thousands of miles. So where in the same hill did I see all those wonderful photos? I shall return to this very site and look for whatever it is that has every in stitches. Oops I hope not in stitches since you are the shrink and not the surgeon.
    
    I am on your list for funny emails,.etc. Please keep me on the list even though I don’t always acknowledge them. ~yvonne~ XXX 🙂
    
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  - Ralph
    14/05/2013
    
    You have an extreme case of mix-ups Yvonne. 😉 I will send them to you again, that should help. 😀
    
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angelswhisper2011
14/05/2013

lol 😀

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- Ralph
  14/05/2013
  
  Thank you AW. 😆 😎 Dr Ralph. PhUn xox 😀
  
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adinparadise
14/05/2013

http://www.cafepress.co.uk/+crowned+underwear-panties 🙂

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- Ralph
  14/05/2013
  
  Wow !! You are the queen of unmentionables Sylvia, I would have never guessed it. Well, maybe I would 😉 Dr Ralph. PhUn xox 😀
  
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Lyann Valadez
14/05/2013

I love the goldfish!

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- Ralph
  14/05/2013
  
  Hi my friend Lyann. Sushi or fried 😉 Dr Ralph. PhUn xox 😀
  
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  - Lyann Valadez
    14/05/2013
    
    Oh, neither, just alive and well 🙂
    
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  - Ralph
    14/05/2013
    
    Of course Lyann 😀
    
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utesmile
14/05/2013

I fed the fish, they were hungry, and I love nurse sleepalot. I might just fall asleep on that beautiful red comfy couch…. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

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- Ralph
  14/05/2013
  
  Hi dear Ute (aside: a regular customer 😉 ) Thank you for feeding the fish. Nurse Sleepalot tells me that she loves you too. Your usual appointment then Ute? An hour’s sleep on the couch ? Pillow ? Dr Ralph. PhUn xox 😀
  
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  - utesmile
    14/05/2013
    
    Yes please! Pillow and throw a nice dream in please. 🙂
    
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  - Ralph
    14/05/2013
    
    You can have Katie’s dream, she won’t mind. I cannot discuss her case with you as it’s a doctor/patient thing. Settle back and enjoy your hour. 😀
    
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Frank
14/05/2013

You are hilarious!!! ROFLMAO!!! Much better than my shrink. I am going to fire him.

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- Ralph
  14/05/2013
  
  I have just the thing to fire him with Frank. Dr Ralph. PhUn 😀
  
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  - Ralph
    14/05/2013
    
    Ouch !!
    
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RoSy
15/05/2013

The fish are hypnotic. Your wish is my command…

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- Ralph
  15/05/2013
  
  *fainted* 😉
  
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tchistorygal
15/05/2013

There is no end to your ideas for PhUN. From crowned undies to matching fish and couch, I’m getting very sleepy. What did you put in that glass of water? What’s that spicket looking thingy coming from the fish tank? Dr. Ra…. glub, zglub zz glz. oh oh! I’m sorry, what was I just saying? I feel so rested like I’ve been asleep, but it was so much PhUN, and I have this weird feeling that I’ve told you more that I remember telling. tee heee I just feel so giddy. Thanks Dr. PhUnny. I see a lot of people he he he he in the waiting room, right here through the fish tank hahaha. Actually I can hear them Dr. PHUn They couldn’t hear… teeee heeee no, of course they,.. Who ARE all those ladies? heee heee hheeee Bye bye, Dr. Ralph No, I don’t need any help walking out. I’m feeling fine. he he he teeee heee 🙂

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- Ralph
  15/05/2013
  
  I am so pleased that lost your sanity in the meditation fish tank MVBF Marsha. More work for me to do with you 😉 Please make your next appointment with Nurse Sleepalot ……. oh, you’ve gone !! Never mind. Dr Ralph. PhUn xox 😀
  
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BeWithUs
15/05/2013

LOL…all kinds of people out there…that’s why, all kinds of searches…btw, love the fish feeding thingy….have fun feeding them…LOL…

Thank you for this sharing…Cheers!! 😀

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- Ralph
  16/05/2013
  
  I know that there are some weird people out there that have somehow happened to have ended up with their searches on my blog. I was hoping to get them into my practice for therapy ………… maybe they have already commented 😉 Dr Ralph. PhUn xox 😀
  
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  - BeWithUs
    16/05/2013
    
    You might be right, perhaps you can look through those unfamiliar first time commenters appearing in those ‘suggested’ posts…LOL…
    
    Have a great day, Doc!!
    
    Cheers!! 😀
    
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  - Ralph
    16/05/2013
    
    It’s not the first timers I am worried about, it’s the regular commenters that I am beginning to know well that I am wary of 😉 Some can be quite a handful 😉
    
    Thank you for the great day which I spent on a drive through the mountains this morning. I hope you have a lovely day too. 😀
    
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smilingtoad
16/05/2013

Incessant grins!!

Autumn Jade

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- Ralph
  16/05/2013
  
  Autumn Jade, my friend, where have you been hiding? Oh. I know. You have just come out of hibernating for the winter. I hope you are eating sufficient fodder from other blogs and it is lovely to see you out and about again. Your comment must have been your shortest ever ………. you do need my help !! 😉 Please make an appointment with Nurse Sleepalot, but keep it short as she is due her nap. Dr Ralph. PhUn xox 😀
  
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  - smilingtoad
    20/05/2013
    
    Aloha dear Ralph! It is so exquisite to be chatting with you again, dear matie. I fear I was away because of illness. I usually do not get sick, it was peculiar. Much improved now. Winds have shifted, welcoming summer and hurricane season! Arg!
    
    Yes, I do believe that was my shortest. Great white….just two words for the body of the thing. I did not know I was capable of such!
    
    To be gamboling and cursitating about your brilliant blog is the best therapy of all, dear Dr Ralph PhUn. Many grinning cheers,
    
    Autumn Jade
    
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  - Ralph
    20/05/2013
    
    Oh. Autumn Jade. My friend. I am so sorry to hear that you were poorly, but I am so glad to see your return is full of your normal wit and wisdom. So prime your pistols of words and I am standing by in anticipation. Big hug. Dr Ralph. PhUn xox 😀
    
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WordsFallFromMyEyes
19/05/2013

You make me laugh 🙂

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- Ralph
  19/05/2013
  
  Really ?? That’s a good thing. You need to laugh more my friend 😀 Ralph xox
  
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shiroknowes
20/05/2013

I will be in good hands ?
I will trust you! 🙂
And by the way with the feeding off the fishes I became crazy.

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- Ralph
  20/05/2013
  
  Ah !! Ms SérachShiro !! You can only trust an expert such as I in the shrinking profession. You became crazy because your clothes got wet while feeding the fish which gave you that need and a shrinking feeling. Take one wet suit before feeding the fish 😉 Dr Ralph. PhUn xox 😀
  
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  - shiroknowes
    20/05/2013
    
    Hahaha I will do Dr. Ralph 🙂
    
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black&white colors
03/06/2013

I’d definitely feel healed after a session with you. Your blog is already healing! So with tears in my eyes & a stomach ache from all the laughter, I wish you a good night!
God bless your sense of humor!

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- Ralph
  03/06/2013
  
  Good night sweet Julita. I will tuck you in, read you a story and turn off the light. All part of the service 😀 Dr Ralph. PhUn xox 😀
  
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