Dr Ralph. PhUn. Psychiatrist

"Top Searches" ???
“Top Searches” ???

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Over the last few weeks I have been collecting the weirdest of Top Searches in my dashboard and these are some of what WordPress gave to me :

Crowned knickers

All landmarks of a British Passport

Nipple cuppings

Family jewels castration

Hidden big nipple camera

Uncle RalphΒ  in Bahamas

Thumbs up penthouse

Small floppy breasts

&

My sister with a mini skirt front of me

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What did I do to get these Top Searches in my Dashboard ??

I need to find answers and fast….. so

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Because of theseΒ idiotic weird words I took a crash course in psychiatry at the Bluefish Way School of Psychiatry where I studied the Works of Fried chips and crisps. I worked tirelessly for about 5 seconds and gave myself a doctorate of psychiatry and letters after my name. So I am Dr Ralph. PhUn fun . I have opened my practice in downtown Bluefish Way

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Lie down here and tell me all about it.
Lie down here and tell me all about it.

So come on in !!

Lie down here !!

Comfy ?? A pillow ??

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Have you got crowned knicker problems or something that you need to get off your chest ??

Then tell Dr Ralph. PhUn. all about it πŸ™‚

separatorSorry, no magazines !! So while you are waiting to see Dr Ralph. PhUn. please click on the meditation fish tank and feed the fish

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Ralph xox

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59 Comments on “Dr Ralph. PhUn. Psychiatrist

    • Hi Gallivanta. Dying laughing is part of the extras package that this practice offers. Please see Nurse Sleepalot on your way out for your next appointment. Thank you for coming. Dr Ralph. PhUn xox πŸ˜€

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    • Hi Tracy. I have studied the Works of Fried extensively and find no mention of crowned knickers. It must be a new illness that some women have. I will have to delve deeply into this and do more research. This could be serious. πŸ˜‰ Dr Ralph. PhUn xox πŸ˜€

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  1. that is so my speed so far this morning ty for giggles in morning instead of swearing!

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  2. I had a dream last night. Can you help me interpret it?
    Flopped on a red velvet couch, on a plane to the islands.. In my left hand: a British passport of the queen; in my right: a cup of jewels. I blink and find myself on a penthouse balcony taking pictures of a cat. ??

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    • Lie back Katie, close your eyes and tell me more. I may have to hypnotise you to find the cause of such a dream πŸ˜‰ Dr Ralph. PhUn xox πŸ˜€

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      • Now Katie …… I can’t hear myself think. There is you Katie hypnotised at one end of the couch, and Ute with Nurse Sleepalot snoring at the other end. πŸ˜‰

        Katie. You are in a deep sleep. What is the first thing that you can remember about the dream which Ute now has? πŸ˜‰

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    • Thank you so much Jen. I am so pleased that you enjoyed this. Dr Ralph. PhUn xox πŸ˜€

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  3. Simply wonderful photos. These are among the top of all Internet photos that I have seen only to be outdone by great pet photos. πŸ™‚

     

    ________________________________

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    • Hi Yvonne. This is off topic.

      For those who are not participating, as well as my non-stop medical duties, I receive photographs & jokes some of which are very naughty but fun and I pass them on to about 10 friends. If you want to be put on my mailing list ….. tell me !!

      This batch were top notch Yvonne. Ralph xox πŸ˜€ (off duty)

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      • A short while ago I got your post and something else mixed up. You see I am already mixed up and cleary in need of a shrink. But it seems to me that you apparently are the shrink for me even though long distance by thousands of miles. So where in the same hill did I see all those wonderful photos? I shall return to this very site and look for whatever it is that has every in stitches. Oops I hope not in stitches since you are the shrink and not the surgeon.

        I am on your list for funny emails,.etc. Please keep me on the list even though I don’t always acknowledge them. ~yvonne~ XXX πŸ™‚

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      • You have an extreme case of mix-ups Yvonne. πŸ˜‰ I will send them to you again, that should help. πŸ˜€

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    • Wow !! You are the queen of unmentionables Sylvia, I would have never guessed it. Well, maybe I would πŸ˜‰ Dr Ralph. PhUn xox πŸ˜€

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  4. I fed the fish, they were hungry, and I love nurse sleepalot. I might just fall asleep on that beautiful red comfy couch…. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

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    • Hi dear Ute (aside: a regular customer πŸ˜‰ ) Thank you for feeding the fish. Nurse Sleepalot tells me that she loves you too. Your usual appointment then Ute? An hour’s sleep on the couch ? Pillow ? Dr Ralph. PhUn xox πŸ˜€

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      • You can have Katie’s dream, she won’t mind. I cannot discuss her case with you as it’s a doctor/patient thing. Settle back and enjoy your hour. πŸ˜€

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  5. There is no end to your ideas for PhUN. From crowned undies to matching fish and couch, I’m getting very sleepy. What did you put in that glass of water? What’s that spicket looking thingy coming from the fish tank? Dr. Ra…. glub, zglub zz glz. oh oh! I’m sorry, what was I just saying? I feel so rested like I’ve been asleep, but it was so much PhUN, and I have this weird feeling that I’ve told you more that I remember telling. tee heee I just feel so giddy. Thanks Dr. PhUnny. I see a lot of people he he he he in the waiting room, right here through the fish tank hahaha. Actually I can hear them Dr. PHUn They couldn’t hear… teeee heeee no, of course they,.. Who ARE all those ladies? heee heee hheeee Bye bye, Dr. Ralph No, I don’t need any help walking out. I’m feeling fine. he he he teeee heee πŸ™‚

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    • I am so pleased that lost your sanity in the meditation fish tank MVBF Marsha. More work for me to do with you πŸ˜‰ Please make your next appointment with Nurse Sleepalot ……. oh, you’ve gone !! Never mind. Dr Ralph. PhUn xox πŸ˜€

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  6. LOL…all kinds of people out there…that’s why, all kinds of searches…btw, love the fish feeding thingy….have fun feeding them…LOL…

    Thank you for this sharing…Cheers!! πŸ˜€

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    • I know that there are some weird people out there that have somehow happened to have ended up with their searches on my blog. I was hoping to get them into my practice for therapy ………… maybe they have already commented πŸ˜‰ Dr Ralph. PhUn xox πŸ˜€

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      • You might be right, perhaps you can look through those unfamiliar first time commenters appearing in those ‘suggested’ posts…LOL…

        Have a great day, Doc!!

        Cheers!! πŸ˜€

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      • It’s not the first timers I am worried about, it’s the regular commenters that I am beginning to know well that I am wary of πŸ˜‰ Some can be quite a handful πŸ˜‰

        Thank you for the great day which I spent on a drive through the mountains this morning. I hope you have a lovely day too. πŸ˜€

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    • Autumn Jade, my friend, where have you been hiding? Oh. I know. You have just come out of hibernating for the winter. I hope you are eating sufficient fodder from other blogs and it is lovely to see you out and about again. Your comment must have been your shortest ever ………. you do need my help !! πŸ˜‰ Please make an appointment with Nurse Sleepalot, but keep it short as she is due her nap. Dr Ralph. PhUn xox πŸ˜€

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      • Aloha dear Ralph! It is so exquisite to be chatting with you again, dear matie. I fear I was away because of illness. I usually do not get sick, it was peculiar. Much improved now. Winds have shifted, welcoming summer and hurricane season! Arg!

        Yes, I do believe that was my shortest. Great white….just two words for the body of the thing. I did not know I was capable of such!

        To be gamboling and cursitating about your brilliant blog is the best therapy of all, dear Dr Ralph PhUn. Many grinning cheers,

        Autumn Jade

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      • Oh. Autumn Jade. My friend. I am so sorry to hear that you were poorly, but I am so glad to see your return is full of your normal wit and wisdom. So prime your pistols of words and I am standing by in anticipation. Big hug. Dr Ralph. PhUn xox πŸ˜€

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  7. I will be in good hands ?
    I will trust you! πŸ™‚
    And by the way with the feeding off the fishes I became crazy.

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    • Ah !! Ms SΓ©rachShiro !! You can only trust an expert such as I in the shrinking profession. You became crazy because your clothes got wet while feeding the fish which gave you that need and a shrinking feeling. Take one wet suit before feeding the fish πŸ˜‰ Dr Ralph. PhUn xox πŸ˜€

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  8. I’d definitely feel healed after a session with you. Your blog is already healing! So with tears in my eyes & a stomach ache from all the laughter, I wish you a good night!
    God bless your sense of humor!

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    • Good night sweet Julita. I will tuck you in, read you a story and turn off the light. All part of the service πŸ˜€ Dr Ralph. PhUn xox πŸ˜€

      Like

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