Common Courtesy

Benalmadena Port Janet Judith watching fishWell I don’t know. I am shocked at what I have just witnessed on a loving, caring blog in the comments area of a post. Usually if I make a comment I make my point and leave it up to the blog owner or other commenters to reply or just read it. If I am asked to expand on my comment, I will. If a thank you is necessary, it only takes a couple of seconds.

A couple of days ago a controversial issue was posted on this particular blog. People wrote comments for and against the subject. Then it turned into a feeding frenzy against one particular person as it became a personal attack on that individual. The victim afterwards emailled me totally distraught and in tears.

Last night I went out for a lovely supper meal with friends, as they didn’t think that I was feeding myself properly. I had a great time and arrived back home 3 hours after I left. Can’t go out for 5 minutes !! My cat, Samantha, had somehow locked herself in the spare bedroom. A door that was never closed was shut with the cat crying inside. I opened my Outlook and there were about 50 comments from that blog. The owner was in tears. On reading and deleting the comments in my Inbox I read in disbelief the hand to hand combat unfolding as I worked my way through the emails. It was awful. There was no reference to the post only personal attacks from all directions. One of the commenters was found to be “fake” just in there stirring up trouble. The owner tried to moderate, but it was too late, the damage had been done. The owner was left with the debris of the battle to somehow clean up. I felt really sorry for that individual and went in, telling them that they had no respect for the owner and that they should apologise. No response.

I think it is only common courtesy to apologise if you have caused offence against another and you had gone over the top, realising later that you had an ooops! moment.

Ooops! Sorry !

37 Comments on “Common Courtesy

  1. Hi Ralph, what a blogging week you’re having, whew! I like your outlook, your views and your correctness (meant in a totally good way) in how you handle things in the online world of bloggers. So sorry about Samantha’s being stuck in the room! Stay safe and happy and grounded (which you do well I think!) Penny


  2. After reading your post, I feel like I should read others’ comment more often, just to know whats happening around.


    • Hello again Diana. I usually keep away from blog comments that fill my Inbox with. “Oh you’re sweet.” “I know I am and you are sweet too.” “I know I am and Googlesoft brain is sweet too.” ” I know he is an…………..unsubscribe.
      Thank you for your comment Diana. No fight in here tonight !! (Whew) 😉


  3. There are people who enjoy being trolls. My grand son tells me never feed the trolls. Just ignore them and delete them. There are trolls who pick on spelling and grammer errors. There are trolls who insult. There are ones who sit back and watch the fire after they start it. I have been blogging for a decade and I have even been stalked by a couple of trolls. I ended up just reading for awhile until they got tired of looking for me. Election season is the worst for drawing out mean trolls. Many of them even have several sock puppet names they work with so they can make you think there are more then one who dislikes your comment or post. After a while you learn to take it with a grain of salt. Bullying has always been in the public square. Thanks for bringing this up. Good post.


  4. Wow, Thank you and your grand son so much, Trkingmomoe. No response, just thank you for the information 🙂


  5. I don’t know the details of what happened, but I’m glad you addressed it. People should be civil. Just because they can’t be seen, doesn’t mean they can’t be affecting others on an emotional level.


    • Precisely, Ms Bumble, when personal attacks come in to play, it is semi-anonymous. The attacker cannot see the victim who could be anybody who may have personal, health or mental problems before the attack and something like this could do all sorts of damage. The owner of the blog has been very brave and dealt with the problem in a sensible and adult manner. I think you will understand why I did not give details of the blog at the centre of all this. Thank you Ms Bumble for your input. 🙂


  6. I don’t know why some people focus on personal attacks instead of discussing a topic like adults. You’re definitely, definitely right: When you know you’re wrong, then apologize for it. It won’t kill you. 😉 Also, I can’t help wondering: How is Samantha? I hope she’s all right! (As you ca tell, I have a soft spot for cats. Lol.)


    • Hi Anna, I expect that you are a softy really. She chased a grasshopper behind the door and pushed the door shut. Thank you for your view 🙂


      • “She chased a grasshopper behind the door and pushed the door shut.” — First sentence: Cute imagery. Second sentence: Oops!


  7. Third sentence: 🙂
    Just clicked, so edited this comment 4 hours later
    Okay Anna, you win !! Samantha shut the door, not you !! Or did you ????? (thinks)


  8. Well said, Ralph. I have yet to be victim of bashing comments yet, but I suspect it will happen someday based on the liberal familial situation that I have. The anonymity of the internet is the main problem, ultimately, and I keep in mind that if I wouldn’t say something to someone’s face, I shouldn’t write it to them.

    Now, if anyone, I mean ANYONE decides to bash on bacon in any way, shape or form, then all bets are off. Beware!



      • Oh, he loves bacon. He’s obsessed with it. He and I stand in solidarity against the Evil Bacon Haters.



      • Hi Emily and Victoria.
        Emily and I stand shoulder to shoulder and we shall fight to the last bacon. 😉


  9. For those of you who do not know what Emily and I are on about with bacon. It’s a game, play it with your children. Pick, say, a film title…..say, The Third Man and change one word to bacon…..The Third Bacon. It can become very funny. Emily at samesides started it. I give her full bacon for this.


    • Very good Victoria !!
      NOTICE BOARD: Bluefish Way has become vegetarian, vegan 😉
      No more rash…er comments. Pleeeeeeease!! 🙂


  10. I’m about to celebrate my first year on the blog–and I’ve had only 2 of these situations come up, thank you Lord. When I apologized, I had the expectation that there would be some positive, reciprocal communication so that we could move forward–but that doesn’t always happen. It might be nice to have a “rule book” for blogs–better yet, for LIFE, eh? God bless you.


    • Hi Caddo, (thinks…….unusual name). Congratulations on your almost one year in blogland. I expect to see and use the rule book for life when Christ returns soon. A little bit of respect and decency mixed with fun and play would not go amiss I’m sure. Thank you for your comment Caddo. Take care. Ralph


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