post

Father O’Ralph. “Let Us Play !!”

You knew this was coming !!

I have achieved many accomplishments since I began blogging. A baker, farmer, psychiatrist, surgeon and now I have decided to become Father O’Ralph (for this post).

The idea was triggered by a post in Honk if you’re a vegan I have been stalking following Celeste for a while now. Her latest post Was Noah really vegan in which she said:

“Genesis 1:29-30 tells us that human and non-human animals alike were given plants to eat, and as you note, this is reiterated in the ninth verse of the second chapter. Genesis 2:18-19 implies that animals were made to be friends or companions to humans. Taken together, these verses strongly suggest peace between God’s human and non-human creatures, prior to the fall.”

So, being me, I had to have fun with this. I commented :

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Celeste’s response was the key to me becoming Father O’Ralph with a dirty habit

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Ideal for the Church of O'Ralph

Ideal for the Church of O’Ralph

Notice Board

My church COO !! or Church of O’Ralph can be found adjacent to the Tea Rooms in Bluefish Way.

Any Nigerian visitors may leave their $17 million donations in the offertory box.

My congregation may congregate.

I do not do births, deaths or marriages but I am available to visit for tea and a piece of crumpet.

The confessional is open 24/7 in comments. Only juicy confessions heard or I’ll get bored. We’ll all get bored !!

Will the flower arrangers place flowers in the vases with the heads upward and not in the water.

There will be a choir practice at 7pm tonight. Please go somewhere else to practice.

Will the parents of our youngest organist Jimmy ask him to stop playing with his organ during my sermon.

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So, time for some fun !!  Ask any question to Father O’Ralph and I will try to reply with a fun scripture, King James Version.

Any theological points or sermons that I am bad, naughty, irreverent and should be sent to hell, will be trashed because I KNOW I AM !!

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So, what is your question my son or daughter ?

or

Do you have juicy confession for Father O’Ralph ?

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Father O’Ralph xox <3

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Comments

  1. That is so funny Father O’Ralph, haha
    I have enjoyed.

    Like

    • Hi Doris :D
      Ecc_2:1 I said in mine heart, Go to now, I will prove thee with mirth, therefore enjoy pleasure.
      Hugs Father O’Ralph xox <3

      Like

  2. I have an important question for you Father O’ Ralph. You know that I have many husbands, and I’m wondering if I’m going to burn in hell fire for this?

    Like

    • Hi Celeste :D

      Joh_4:18 For thou hast had five husbands…..
      Psa_139:8 ……. if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there. (hehe)

      So cosy ;) Father O’Ralph xox <3

      Like

  3. Only juicy confession? LoL… That sounds like Father O’Ralph is misconducting :)

    Like

    • Hi YC :D
      Job_41:5 Wilt thou play with him as with a bird? or wilt thou bind him for thy maidens?
      Is that juicy enough for you my friend ? ;)
      Father O’Ralph :D

      Like

  4. LOL… Irreverent? Yes. But of God? I don’t think so. Although your post does give me cause to blush a bit, I appreciate its satire. ;)

    Like

    • Hi Rene :D

      Isa_1:18 Come now, and let us reason together, saith the LORD: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.

      Oh dear, Rene. I’ve caused you to blush again, and again, and again !! It will all work out well for us. You’ll see. Big hug. Father O’Ralph xox <3

      Like

  5. Oh, dear lord, I didn’t know you were my father! (You called me ‘daughter’) What WAS my mother thinking of? oxo <3

    Like

    • Hi Yvonne :D

      Gen_20:12 And yet indeed she is my sister; she is the daughter of my father, but not the daughter of my mother; and she became my wife.

      It gets complicated, so we must keep this as a family secret. I am sure your mother must have enjoyed my missionary work. Most young ladies did !! ;)

      Big hug to my new found daughter (any more out there ?? ;) ) Father O’Ralph xox <3

      Like

  6. Father O’ Ralph… I am a complete sinner. How can I start with this confession?… Good one my friend, best wishes, Aquileana :)

    Like

    • Hello Aquileana :D

      Son 2:14 O my dove, that art in the clefts of the rock, in the secret places of the stairs, let me see thy countenance, let me hear thy voice; for sweet is thy voice, and thy countenance is comely.

      Just the juicy bits, please, my friend. Hugs. Father O’Ralph xox <3

      Like

  7. Oh, dear. I just had an email from my niece Alida. Her padded green envelope has arrived, and her jealous husband is asking probing questions about this Ralph fellow who lives in Spain. You may find her on your doorstep ant day now. But, that’s OK, she’s gorgeous, and she likes cats. :-)

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    • Hi Yvonne, my daughter :D

      Jdg_19:26 Then came the woman in the dawning of the day, and fell down at the door of the man’s house where her lord was, till it was light.
      Luk_22:12 And he shall shew you a large upper room furnished: there make ready.

      I have no idea who this Ralph from Spain is !!
      Hugs. Father O’Ralph (from Spain) xox <3

      Like

  8. This was nice… Blessing and Happiness dear Ralph, Thank you, love, nia

    Like

    • Hi dear Nia :D

      Son 7:6 How fair and how pleasant art thou, O love, for delights!

      Have a fun day my friend. Father O’Ralph xox <3

      Like

  9. I think I will confess to gluttony.

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  10. Father O’Ralph, this is brilliant. To be sure. I am going to come to confession but I am busy making up a sex shanty sorry sea shanty and just waiting for the Nigerian visitors so I can get the millions out the box.

    Like

    • Hi Shehanne :D

      Isa_27:2 In that day sing ye unto her, A vineyard of red wine. ;)
      Gen_31:27 Wherefore didst thou flee away secretly, and steal away from me; and didst not tell me, that I might have sent thee away with mirth, and with songs, with tabret, and with harp? (and the millions ;) )

      I need to work on you a lot my friend. Hugs. Father O’Ralph xox <3

      Like

  11. father o’ralph, there are just too many sins to list, can i just say one prayer as penance to cover them all and move on?

    Like

    • Hello Beth :D

      Job_16:2 I have heard many such things…….
      1Ki_11:1 But king Solomon loved many strange women……
      Deu_7:13 And he will love thee, and bless thee, and multiply thee…..

      Certainly. You may say one prayer in Penzance, Cornwall, England ;)
      Big hug. Father O’Ralph xox <3

      Like

  12. Merhaba Ralph :)
    senin güzel dostluk için çok teşekkür ederim
    mutlu ve hoş bir hafta sonu diliyorum…sevgi ile kalın :)

    Like

    • Merhaba Seçil. Ne kadar da tatlı gelir ve bu tür sözler söylemek ziyaret etmek. Sana bir eğlenceli, fantastik ve güneşli bir hafta sonu olacak umuyoruz arkadaşım. Hugs. Father O’Ralph xox <3

      Like

  13. As much as I try to behave – it’s not always easy & sometimes my evil twin takes over. And – it ain’t pretty. What to do?
    xx Saludos y Abrazos xx

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    • Hello dear RoSy (1 or 2 ? ) :D

      Son_4:5 Thy two breasts are like two young roes that are twins, which feed among the lilies.

      NO ! NAUGHTY !! Not that one Father O’Ralph ! This one >>>>>

      Mat_6:3 But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth:

      Big hug my friend. Father O’Ralph xox <3

      Like

  14. I hope you can help me, Father Ralph. We have very cute priest in our community. He shall remain nameless but his initial is R. He’s new to the calling and I can’t seem to stop talking about smooching to him. I’m afraid this may hinder his good deeds. What do you think, how do I get all this smooching with the new priest off my mind? Help!

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  15. Hello Elizabeth :D This is an extreme case of smittenness, for thou art smitten. I should take these following words to heart and go forth and multiply…… or add,subtract or divide ;)

    Son_1:2 Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth: for thy love is better than wine.

    I think you should also see me in the vestry as this is serious and this smooching needs to be tested before I make my decision on how not to help you. I am sure that it’s no hindrance to his good deeds. Big smooch. Father O’Ralph xox <3

    Like

  16. ^^’ Oh my <3

    Like

  17. Very clever post… I have enjoyed it and it out a smile on my face…

    Like

  18. Holy Ralph, you are hysterical. May the father bless you! xo :)

    Like

  19. ✿❀¸¸.•*´¯`❀ ✿ BUON WEE-KEND ✿❀¸¸.•*´¯`❀ ✿

    Like

  20. I’m coming for tea and a crumpet, Ralph!! Have ‘em ready. You know how my mood gets when I’m hungry.

    Like

  21. Dominus Vobiscum! I know it’s not a sin, it’s not juicy. However as a veggie, I can attest to the fact that there are many juicy fruits (including tomatoes). ;-) :-)

    Like

    • Hi Resa :D Thou art perfect in the eyes of Father O’Ralph. Go thee hence and savour the taste of banana and grapes for thy sustenance. :cool: Hugs from Father O’Ralph xox :D <3

      Like

  22. SerachShiro says:

    Dear father O’Ralph, I wish I lived closer so I could come to confess me in that gorgeous building I saw on the picture……hahaha ! loved this post and you have really a lot a fabulous fantasy :) ! Have a splendid new week friend !

    Like

    • Hello my daughter :D Yes. I do enjoy my fantasy posts. Such fun comments including yours Serach. Hugs. Father O’Ralph xox <3

      Like

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