with thanks to Roxie who I will never argue with
Now that you have seen the training video I would now like to discuss the method I use on arguing with women.
As I am living alone I will not be thumped, not spoken to for a week or find my dinner in the dog. So here goes. I have been involved in a few arguments with women over the years which usually starts over
nothing something trivial such as
Which colour dress shall I wear this evening. Oh. I think the red one looks really nice What’s wrong with the green one ? There is nothing wrong with the green one, they are both lovely, you choose then. Why can’t you make a decision. You always leave it up to me ! The green one. Definitely the green one. But you said the red one just now. You are so indecisive. Men ! I can never get a straight answer from you ! Okay the red. I am sticking with the red. It looks really great on you. I can’t wear the red because I wore it 3 months ago at Jane’s party.
oh for goodness sake Then it will have to be the green one then. It looks smashing on you. Oh no ! *tears* I wore that at Jenny’s party. Waaaaaaah ! I have nothing to wear tonight…….
The argument has now reached the crossroads
- Come here let me give you a hug. Go away it’s all your fault !!
- I am sure you will find something nice. Nice !! You don’t listen do you. I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR TONIGHT !! GOT IT !!
- I am just going to check to see if the car is okay. You and your car ! What about me ?!??!
- Haven’t you got anything ? I should have listened to your Mother when she told me about ……….
- Okay. I’ll cancel………….. CANCEL !! *Posturing* This is my special night and YOU want to cancel !!
My response at this point is to walk away. Take the goldfish for a walk. Fix a blocked drain in my best suit. Anything !! Return in a few minutes very quietly. If I hear …and then you took my best cup and dropped it …… Which happened ten years ago ! Walk away again without being heard or seen. Return after a few more minutes. And if there is silence. Peep into the room she is in and hopefully, yes, she is wearing the RED DRESS !!
Are you like her ? Are you like me ? Or are you different ? A cat on a hot tin roof or a purring pussy cat ?
If there is a resemblance of any blogger being recognised here by their partner it is purely intentional. Fight !!