post

Bits And Pieces

 ~ WARNING : THIS  IS  A  VERY  LONG  POST. ~

IF  WHILE  READING YOU  FEEL  LIKE  YOU  ARE  HYPERVENTILATING  >  LOOSEN  CLOTHES  (send photo)  >  SUCK  AND  BLOW  INTO  A  BROWN  PAPER  BAG  A  FEW  TIMES  (don’t forget to remove the wine bottle from the brown paper bag.)

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Bits and pieces ?  No, no, no !  Not them !  These  >>>>>>

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~ Hot Cats ~

My English friends,  David & Hilda,  who live in their finca nearby,   have been rescuing dogs & cats for years.  This summer has been really hot (40C) and some of their cats show it.

Wonky

Wonky

Biscuit

Biscuit

Tosca in a watering can

Tosca in a watering can

Gibson

Gibson

Fandango

Fandango

Fandango

Fandango

Fandango

Fandango

Thanks for the photos Hilda.  Big hug :D <3

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~ Three Years ~

My blog,  Bluefish Way,  passed the 3 year level last week

Happy Anniversary!

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You registered on WordPress.com 3 years ago!

Thanks for flying with us. Keep up the good blogging!

Thank you WordPress.  If it ain’t broke don’t fix it !   You listening WordPress ?

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 ~ Toni’s Cooking ~

This is an example of how Toni,  my Spanish neighbour,  cooks for me every night for almost 3 years.

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Toni

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Thank you Toni & Pedro.  Big hug :D <3

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~ Train Journey ~

So one day last week I left my home near Cortes de la Frontera for my next session of acupuncture in Gibraltar.  I went by train & taxi in Spain  and caught a bus in Gibraltar.

My cats were crying (with happiness) as I closed the apartment door.

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I walked to Cortes de la Fontera station, arriving early.

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And then !

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Half an hour late my train appeared.

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I settled down in my seat to enjoy my stress free travelling experience to San Roque.

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~ Acupuncture ~

Amazingly I arrived in Gibraltar spot on time for my second acupuncture appointment.

Francesca again was very professional, kind and caring as I spent almost 2 hours in her hands and I sense a subtle improvement with my balance & hands.

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Francesca

Hopefully next week we will take some photos of Francesca at work on me.  You’ll just love to see me getting the needle, won’t you ?

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~ Going Home ~

After 2 hours I started my return journey back home to Spain from Gibraltar.

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Arriving at San Roque in Spain by taxi I found somewhere cool to sit ….

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…. before entering the station. 

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The first train to arrive …..

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… emptied the platform.

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A few minutes later my train, heading north, decided to pick me up.

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I settled down in my seat to enjoy my stress free travelling experience to Cortes de la Frontera.

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I think Wendy and Yvonne may have a competition going on here ;)

Wendy

Wendy

Yvonne

Yvonne

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The train raced though the lower hills …..

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….. winding its way along the side of a deep gorge …..

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…. where the drought has totally emptied the Rio Guadiaro.

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Speeding round bends and through tunnels, the train is finally coming to my village.

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It passes my apartment in the big wonky shaped house ….

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…. and coming to a stop at my local station where I got off into the afternoon heat.

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Whew !  What a day !  And what a long post !

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Do you ….. ?

I’d like to …..

( I have no idea what I’m talking about.  It’s the heat ! )

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Ralph xox <3

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post

Needles & Cats Eyes

One day last week.

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I went to Gibraltar for my first of 7 sessions of acupuncture Samantha !  The same day each week …

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… which entails a lot of difficult travelling from my home in the mountains of southern Spain to Gibraltar and back again.

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The cats and I live in those mountains (arrowed)

Spain Considers Gibraltar Border Fee...GIBRALTAR - AUGUST 08:  The peninsular of Gibraltar on August 8, 2013 in Gibraltar. David Cameron has spoken with his Spanish counterpart, Mariano Rajoy, and Mr Rajoy has offered to 'reduce measures' at the Gibraltar border. Tensions between the British and Spanish governments have been raised on issues surrounding the sovereignty of Gibraltar. An increase in Spanish border crossing checks between the Rock and mainland Spain, leading to lengthy queues, is widely considered to be a retaliatory move for the construction of an artificial reef in British waters, which it is claimed has had a negative impact on Spanish fishing vessels in the area.  (Photo by Oli Scarff/Getty Images)

Spain Considers Gibraltar Border Fee…GIBRALTAR – AUGUST 08: The peninsular of Gibraltar on August 8, 2013 in Gibraltar. David Cameron has spoken with his Spanish counterpart, Mariano Rajoy, and Mr Rajoy has offered to ‘reduce measures’ at the Gibraltar border. Tensions between the British and Spanish governments have been raised on issues surrounding the sovereignty of Gibraltar. An increase in Spanish border crossing checks between the Rock and mainland Spain, leading to lengthy queues, is widely considered to be a retaliatory move for the construction of an artificial reef in British waters, which it is claimed has had a negative impact on Spanish fishing vessels in the area. (Photo by Oli Scarff/Getty Images)

Last week a friend took me to Gibraltar in her car.  The traffic queue to the border was horrendous. The last mile took one hour mainly due to the road across the runway being closed as there were aircraft landing.

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I eventually arrived half an hour late.

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Next week I will be taking a train, taxi and bus instead of going by car.  That should make a good post !

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I spent 2 hours with the very pretty, professional, kind and caring young lady.  Most of the time she was reviewing my medical history followed by a half an hour with twelve needles in me.  I was okay with it.  What I did realise is that I have been missing the feminine energies of hugs and touch for a very, very long time.  Something I will have to rectify  :D

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Then I went for lunch with my friend here in Casement Square

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If I lived in 1800 I would have had melons instead of a huge veggy burger for lunch.

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Meanwhile, back in my home.

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Do you like to be touched and hugged ?

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Ralph xox <3

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WARNING  TO  MY  EUROPEAN  BLOGGING  FRIENDS

This is scary.  If you are a WP European EU blogger you must by EU law notify your readers that WP uses cookies on your blog.  If you don’t, you face a hefty fine.  There is a new WP Dashboard  “EU Cookie Law Banner”  widget which does the work for you.  I have checked “dark” and “scroll”.   Click on the picture for more info.

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The cats and the images of me are mine.  I do not take credit for the rest as they are not mine and never will be.

post

Hairy Yeti

I just cut my hair in the bathroom.  How did it go ?  It was hairy.

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click for the big picture

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click for the big picture

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Do you know a Yeti, or do you live with one ?

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Ralph xox <3

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The Yeti in this post is not my girlfriend,  nor was she found on a dating agency. She is an image from a Goodle search and is not mine and I would hate to give her a wax if she was my girlfriend. ;)

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Heehee <3

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post

Dr No

 THIS IS AN UPDATE MEDICAL POST,  SORT OF.

~ (THE CATS ARE AT THE END OF THIS POST) ~

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You would have thought it was the easiest thing in the world to walk down to the clinic and hand in a letter to my local doctor.   Not in my Spanish village !  The doctor visits two mornings a week.

To see the doctor I had to go to the Town Hall THE DAY BEFORE his visit at midday to put my name on the list and get a number.  There is no Reception just a woman in the waiting room with a pen and a blank list who would not write anything until midday.

I was third in the queue which means I’ll be #3  to be seen by the doctor.   ( I have to get a number, as the last time I saw the doctor with a letter from the hospital Neurologist he moaned and muttered for 10 minutes about me not having a number.   It didn’t matter that I was still in the hospital ward the afternoon before.)

Midday.  The woman started writing down the first name.  They chatted in Spanish and another four names were added to the list.  Okay, I’ll be #7 then.

Unbelievably the person in front of me added not only her name but another three to the list.  Okay, I’ll be #10 then.

As I approached the pen wielding woman ANOTHER Spanish woman walked into the waiting room and proceeded to add names to the list.  I was ignored.  Eventually I was the proud owner of #14.  Not bad for #3 eh ?

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The following day I got to see the doctor and handed him this letter (which I Google Translated into Spanish for him).  He laughed at the last sentence and said he will talk to the Neurologist that afternoon.

Yay.  Letter delivered.

Dear Doctor,
Please can you inform Dr *********** (Neurologist, ***** Hospital) that I do not wish to continue with any more chemical treatment for the “Lewis Sumner”. There has been no improvement and I cannot see any in sight. My hands are still useless for picking up small items, doing buttons, writing, eating with knife and fork etc. and my balance is still poor.
Although I am not leaving the Spanish Health Service I need to try other options outside that may be possible treatments for my hands and balance, such as Acupuncture etc.
Please thank her for trying over the years. Cannot win them all.
Ralph

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I did not make this decision lightly.  Over 2+ years I have been diagnosed as having Parkinsons’ then it was genetic and recently Lewis Sumner.  I had the full battery of tests which really found nothing related to my hands and balance.  I reckon it’s a reaction to stress and lack of female company :D

The treatments produced no improvement.

  1. Initial course of tablets made me sleepy
  2. Next type of tablets my feet blew up like balloons
  3. 25 bottles of IvIg drips. A week in the ward. No change.
  4. Finally, a course of drips with side effects ranging from death to disability which may knock my immune system for six.  No change.

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So for me, enough is enough !

Here are some ideas which you can help me with. 

Vote as many times as you like.

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What do you think I should do ?

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HERE THEY ARE.

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Like this ?

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Cats !

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Ralph xox <3

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post

Come On Baby Light My Fire

THIS IS A CAT FREE POST

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Yes, you are, Sonic !  Please stop ripping up my dressing gowns and get out of my wardrobe !

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Last Tuesday I was invited by my Spanish neighbours to a street party to celebrate San Juan Day. 

As I haven’t a clue what it was about I have asked a couple of guests to explain what was going on.

Over to you.

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I just love our names,  Hay Rick and Hay Feeva.  

When we hit the sack I cuddle up to her,  “Hay baby ?”. 

She tumbleweeds over,  “Not tonight,  I’ve got a bale of a headache”. 

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Anyway,  back to the street party.

Yay !   A barbie !

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The idea of a barbie is to blow the brains out of it  …….

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….. then use the glowing charcoal to turn the food into charcoal.

It’s a man thing !

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The guests arrive for the street party.

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Remember baby Liam ?

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Remember Ralph ?

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Neighbours from three different homes.

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Remember to buy a lottery ticket.

Although deaf and dumb,  day and night the vendor sells lottery tickets for his charity “ONCE”

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 While the men are setting fire to the countryside the women are working out what each person must pay for the food and drink.

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Food,  such as this.

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This woman is easily buttered up,  well bread and uses her loaf.

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Liam,  at  6 months,  is now learning to drink beer like the man he is.

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After eating and drinking,  time for some photies.

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(click for the big picture)

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At midnight everyone goes down to the river to splash water on their faces.  Don’t ask !

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(click for the big picture)

(click for the big picture)

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When everyone was nice and clean for this year they all returned for the finale of the night.  Us !   Yes, us, the Hays !

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A couple of minutes later.

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I would like to thank both the Hay family (for not explaining what San Juan Day was all about) and the neighbours around me who organised the street party.

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Have you played on a hayrick ?

I have.  Don’t ask !  :D

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Ralph xox <3

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post

Turkey Stalls

The other day a few non-Spanish (English etc.) ladies laid on stalls in my local Spanish village.   Well, they didn’t actually lie down on their stalls,  but sold unwanted items from their homes on the stalls.  You know what I mean.

I decided to walk around the outskirts of the  Spanish village to reach the event. 

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Walking up a narrow path I saw a turkey sitting on a wall.

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“Hello Ralph.”

“Oh wow !  You’re a turkey and you spoke to me.  That’s really great.”

“Yes.  If you kiss me I will change into a beautiful Princess and I will do anything for you.  I mean anything !”

“Umm”

She flew down into my arms.

“You may kiss me now.”

Cradled in my arms,  I looked into her eyes and continued walking up the narrow path.

“Why don’t you kiss me ?   I promise to turn into a beautiful Princess and I will do anything you wish.”

Stroking her feathers, I replied,

“At my age I would rather have a talking turkey.”  :D

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“I’m never going to talk to you again Ralph”

With that she wriggled free and flew back to the top of the wall and never spoke to me again.

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The moral of this story is:

Don’t let an opportunity slip through your fingers as it may turn out to be a right royal turkey after all.

Or

A turkey in the hand is worth a Princess at a push.

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I walked on,  across the rail line,  along a dusty road track,  through the railway station …….

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….. and arrived at the stalls across the road from La Parra Bar.

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Walking in the middle of the road is a favourite pastime in my Spanish village. The first word a child learns is “COCHE !” (car !).  I reckon all the kids here think their mum is called Coche. Something to do with the back seat I suppose.

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Tired of rummaging through the stalls I sat drinking coffee,  watching the train pass and catching up with all the local news and gossip.

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I passed Her Royal Turkeyness on the way home.  Not a cheep, gobble or grumble from her.

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I did buy a few things from off the stalls though.

An orange squeezer ……

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…… and this lovely cover for the settee. 

But no Princess to drape herself seductively on it.

Any volunteers ?  (NO turkeys please !)

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” I want two volunteers !  Samantha !  Sonic !  You are both volunteering for draping on the settee duties. “

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Are you magic ?  If so, who are you really ?

Okay.  Okay.  One of you is the wicked witch who is turning me into a …… ?

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Ralph xox <3

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Slippery Customer

A simple morning’s local shopping in Daddy’s Spanish village.

My name’s Sonic, Daddy’s boy cat, and this is my story.

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A 20 minute round trip and Daddy returns home.

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So back to his apartment Daddy comes.

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Daddy arrives home laden down with cat food.

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Good or bad,  Daddy unconditionally loves us all.  We love him too.

Love Sonic xxx <3

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Talking of money, I bought a birthday gift for a friend on Amazingzon which should have been easy as I had an account with the online store.  Hah !  They would not accept my credit card.  Oh boy !

I tried a few times then realised I had a new credit card from my bank, so I changed the details and it still didn’t go through.  So I called the phone number on the back of the Spanish credit card.

If you speak English ….. press 2

If you have a credit card problem  ….. press 4

*music*

If you need an operator ….. press 16

*music*

All our operators are busy ……press 120

*music*

Do you wish to speak to an Indian lady from Mumbai …… press 305

*music*

If you are still there …… press 1432

suddenly

Hello. This is the Hot Chick line.  Con-u-out-of-your-money speakin…

I must have pressed the wrong digits.  Honest !  So I try again.  Eventually I got through.

How may I help. This is Abhilaasha speaking.

My card doesn’t work online and it has been activated.

For your security I must ask you these questions.

How old was your father on his 60th birthday ?

Umm ….. 30 ?

Correct !  When is your birthday ?

Why ?  Are you going to send me a card ?

Correct !  Your card was activated for use in a cash-point and in stores , but not for online use.

WHAT ?

How much do you wish to spend online ?

Enough for a present and to renew my WP account.

Your card is now activated for online use.

Thank you.  Bye !

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And it worked !  I bought the present from Amazingzon. 

All this hoohaa reminded me to update my credit card details with WP.  If I lose my WP premium theme and domain name at the end of this month, you know where I will be …..

Phoning flippin’ India !

And I’m not buying a new pair of slippers online.  Just in case.  :D

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Do you like pretty paper ?

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Ralph xox <3

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OOTD : All Day Outfit

I have to stay quiet while typing this post.  The cats are asleep …….

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…… and I don’t want to be disturbed as I want this to be a serious post.

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The other week Julia ……

Julia

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…. conned asked me nicely to do an Outfit Of The Day (OOTD) post.

So here we go.

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<3 Hello my lubblies <3

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I would like to show you my All Day Outfit.

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The idea is to wear office and leisure clothes at the same time.

Here I am ready to go to the office.

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The jacket is 40+ years old.  Made by Kinglynne.   It has been with me to work in many countries around the world and is still smart and fits me well.

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The shirt on the other hand was bought for €5 about 4 years ago at a local Spanish street market. It was so good I bought 10;  5 long sleeve and 5 short, all different.  Made by AVSNA.

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After a hard day’s work playing games on the office computer, remove the jacket and by wearing shorts I would be in instant leisure mode.  Made by A.B.C. 

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In reality I am retired and maybe I need new clothes.  I am not mean and my clothes are generally in good condition.  So…..

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…… I would love a woman to come with me to help buy new clothes, but I am worried about that for many reasons :

1)   She might want me to buy a shell suit with a hoodie.  Then I’ll be arrested.  ……

2)   ….. or she might buy me the modern street type of trousers where the waistband is worn below the knees exposing my superhero orange day-glo underwear with flashing Christmas lights.

3)  She might “borrow” my credit card and disappear into a wine bar for the day.

4)  She may require me to have a tattoo, with words such as I love (insert name here).  I don’t want a tattoo with “I love insert name here” all over my back !

5)  What would you say in #5 so as to give me a panic attack ?

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I know most women detest shoe & clothes shopping.  I would hate to have to drag her screaming around countless shops all day when she would be really happy at home changing diapers or waging war on her teenage son whose eyeballs are superglued to his smartphone and hands twitching on a game controller.  I just know she would hate to leave her teenage daughter who is constantly soaking her bed with tears after dumping the 7th boyfriend this week and it’s only Tuesday !

Then, of course, there is the more mature lady who has been there, seen it, read the book and slept through the film.  I could probably bribe her with a meal and bottle of wine after she has watched her favourite daytime soap on TV.

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Thank heavens I have got through this post without interference by my cats and they’ re still asleep.  Amazing !

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Would you go shopping with me and what would you buy for me ?

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Ralph xox <3

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The Magnificent Seven. Post 2 of 2

Just to bring any new readers up to speed,  Sonic & Samantha are Ralph’s two cats in Spain and they talk too much. 

This post contains the last 3 set of photos from movies that I might have starred in.  Tickets please !

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Oh no !  Not again !

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I totally agree with you Samantha.  Sonic is so bossy.

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Sci-fi.  Yellow alien gets blown away by our hero !

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Ouch !

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Dancing from scratch !

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What !

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:star: :star: :star: :star: :star:

Resa

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:star: :star: :star: :star: :star:

If I do it, I’ll need a fitting……and NO pins Resa !

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Thanks a lot.  NOT pretty enough, eh,  Sonic ?

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7.

Wild cat in a hat.

Performed by Cheetah Lott,  megastar Ralph’s stuntman and stand in.

:star: :star: :star: :star: :star:

Click for the big picture

Give Cheetah Lott a tummy rub for the big picture

Yoou don't have to click for the big picture in case you get too excited and come here banging on my door !

Stroke Cheetah Lott for the big picture.

:star: :star: :star: :star: :star:

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Thanks again Toni for taking the movie stills.

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Did you love me & the movie stills ?

Okay !  You only love Cheetah Lott,  the hats and the cats.  No change there then  :D

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Ralph xox <3 :star:

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No yellow alien was harmed in the making of this post.

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The Magnificent Seven. Post 1 of 2

These 2 posts are inspired by Drake …..

Drake

….. who made this comment in my last post.

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Last week Toni, my neighbour, came up to my apartment to take photographs of me for an OOTD (Outfit Of The Day) post, but it never quite happened as we thought because we ……

…… HAD FUN !

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I wear many hats.  Not that I can do different things. It’s just that I wear many hats.

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Toni and I decided to take stills of Ralph’s Greatest movies ever that I’m bound to star in.  :star:

Here goes.  The first 4 movies of 7.

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Hint:   Sci-fi.  What ?  No stars in the sky ?

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2.

Hint:   “You are a dead man, Shames Pond”

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3.

Hint:   Stalking you is my speciality. I can see what you are NOT wearing.

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4.

Hint:  Desirable desert dame for dessert.

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:star: :star: :star: :star: :star:

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I know you want to click this photo for the big photo fellas

I know you want to click this photo for the big picture Guys. And Ladies this is how an OOTD should be done. lol

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:star: :star: :star: :star: :star:

So you want me on the red carpet. (Well you’ll have to wine and dine me first ! )

Mind you, this is nothing compared to next week’s movie #7 !

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Thanks Toni for taking these photographs.

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Can you put titles to these movies in your usual wacky, weird way ?

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Ralph xox <3  :star:

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Next week.  Same time.  Same place.  New shocking movie stills.  Free popcorn.

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